Seems that the more I read, the more reading tangents I experience.
I started reading Debbie Mirza's book, "The Safest Place Possible," and I didn't get too far into the book before she made reference to the Hawaiian reconciliation practice of Ho'oponopono. This then led me to learn more about Dr. Hew Len's experience with the practice, and that was all the convincing I needed to hastily adopt this as part of my morning ritual.
Sure. My ritual is lighting a candle after my "morning evacuation," and merely thanking the universe for my husband, my house, my health, and I usually conclude that moment of mindfulness asking "please help me--help me help others."
The mindfulness of Ho'oponopono's "I'm sorry. Forgive me. I love you. Thank you." seemed to fit right in with my morning sentiments.
Perhaps in doing so, there is some cosmic benefit, a Butterfly Effect of sorts. Perhaps.
Though I'm a skeptic about ALL THINGS, I don't see any harm in incorporating this as part of my morning routine.
I am having a difficult time getting any kind of traction with my CBT sessions. I have done the two assessment sessions and now have gone through two sessions after, which should have been where we start working with the CBT techniques.
The problem of course is that I have repressed/suppressed/stifled my feelings all my life, and the things that I feel the most intense are merely the things on the surface. I cannot seem to dig far enough in to actually feel my feelings--which of course leads me to feel like I am failing myself, as I am pretty desperate to do what I can to change my mood and outlook and mindset.
Tuesday's session wasn't all that useful to me personally, as we were filling out a mood log of an emotional event, and I couldn't get beyond four distinct feelings.
I've brought the mood log home and devoted more time to it, and even have solicited a friend who knows me pretty well to read my log and offer insights about my self which I cannot seem to tap into. He makes so much sense and has astutely shared his insights in the past about me or my experiences, in ways which I hadn't been able to process or articulate.
I am continuing to work towards finding a solution to my pain issues, which will then lead me to being more active, which is also a part of the CBT regimen, taking care of myself. Meditation has been a part of that, however, I need to find something that holds my attention better than the Headspace app. I don't know if it's too simplistic or the voice of the narrator or what, but I cannot really sink my teeth into that as a meditation tool.
I am resistant to doing more physical therapy, but look at it as part of the process rather than the thing which will ultimately provide me pain relief. It's merely a step in the protocol that needs to be followed in order for me to get to the subsequent step or steps that will get me where I need to be.
Right this moment, I am pushing away feelings of futility and even depression or sadness or frustration, as they aren't productive or serving any good purpose for me. But it's hard to remain optimistic when, simply put, I don't feel well.
I started reading Debbie Mirza's book, "The Safest Place Possible," and I didn't get too far into the book before she made reference to the Hawaiian reconciliation practice of Ho'oponopono. This then led me to learn more about Dr. Hew Len's experience with the practice, and that was all the convincing I needed to hastily adopt this as part of my morning ritual.
Sure. My ritual is lighting a candle after my "morning evacuation," and merely thanking the universe for my husband, my house, my health, and I usually conclude that moment of mindfulness asking "please help me--help me help others."
The mindfulness of Ho'oponopono's "I'm sorry. Forgive me. I love you. Thank you." seemed to fit right in with my morning sentiments.
Perhaps in doing so, there is some cosmic benefit, a Butterfly Effect of sorts. Perhaps.
Though I'm a skeptic about ALL THINGS, I don't see any harm in incorporating this as part of my morning routine.
I am having a difficult time getting any kind of traction with my CBT sessions. I have done the two assessment sessions and now have gone through two sessions after, which should have been where we start working with the CBT techniques.
The problem of course is that I have repressed/suppressed/stifled my feelings all my life, and the things that I feel the most intense are merely the things on the surface. I cannot seem to dig far enough in to actually feel my feelings--which of course leads me to feel like I am failing myself, as I am pretty desperate to do what I can to change my mood and outlook and mindset.
Tuesday's session wasn't all that useful to me personally, as we were filling out a mood log of an emotional event, and I couldn't get beyond four distinct feelings.
I've brought the mood log home and devoted more time to it, and even have solicited a friend who knows me pretty well to read my log and offer insights about my self which I cannot seem to tap into. He makes so much sense and has astutely shared his insights in the past about me or my experiences, in ways which I hadn't been able to process or articulate.
I am continuing to work towards finding a solution to my pain issues, which will then lead me to being more active, which is also a part of the CBT regimen, taking care of myself. Meditation has been a part of that, however, I need to find something that holds my attention better than the Headspace app. I don't know if it's too simplistic or the voice of the narrator or what, but I cannot really sink my teeth into that as a meditation tool.
I am resistant to doing more physical therapy, but look at it as part of the process rather than the thing which will ultimately provide me pain relief. It's merely a step in the protocol that needs to be followed in order for me to get to the subsequent step or steps that will get me where I need to be.
Right this moment, I am pushing away feelings of futility and even depression or sadness or frustration, as they aren't productive or serving any good purpose for me. But it's hard to remain optimistic when, simply put, I don't feel well.
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