The Poop Report

Rather than go into the particulars of today's *ahem* movement, I've decided it best to share what I call "hai-poos," which is to say, haiku about POO.

*AHEM*

Oh puckered o-ring
Bearing down, extrude! extrude!
Won’t you stop throbbing?

Throb, throb, throb, throb, throb
Flames, shooting out my ass, still
Still throb, 9 to 6.

A total standstill
My G.I. tract a dead end
Did I eat concrete?

Strong Firey Krakken!
I once knew your name very well!
My ass has grown mute.

DEMON DOWN BELOW!
Breach birth’d anal alien
Tear me limb from limb.

Such a cosmic joke
Anal. Hellfire. Damnation.
Won’t sit right for days.

On every third day
I have to birth a demon
It holds me hostage.