Had uterine ablation and tubal ligation on 7/23. So far so good, though I'm still a bit unimpressed. Surgical procedures were fine and came with it the predictable discomfort from, at least, the laproscopic portion of the procedures. And here it is, about 11 days later, and it appears as if my period has not stopped. It's not mere discharge. I cannot go without wearing a pad. And this has me depressed and wondering if this procedure is going to help me in the long run.
Saw the surgeon on 7/31 for the post-surgical follow up, and he said that all seems well, and he didn't want to see me for another year. Though did make mention that with my adenomyosis, uterine ablation aside, I still could have between period spotting. I've been reading up on the topic and I guess this current "spotting" (subtext: NEVER ENDING PERIOD) might abate after about 4-5 weeks. I'm just hoping that things even out thereafter and I won't have to worry about a hysterectomy. Just trying to bide my time for the next 5-7 years until menopause hits. I really, really want to keep my uterus (for structural reasons, as I don't need more difficulties in the bathroom than I currently have).
I don't feel 100%, despite getting a return to work letter for 8/1. Mentally I'm drained today, and have a birthday BBQ to go to, which I *am* looking forward to, but at this very moment, I'm struggling with myself to get showered up and out the house and be in a festive mood, when really for the first time in 11 days, I just feel like crying.
I'm hoping I'll feel better once I'm showered up and dressed, and I guess if I am still not feeling 100% while at the party, I can excuse myself. I baked a special cake for the day and hope it's as delicious as I expect it to be.
If it's not my pain debilitating me and keeping me from DOING THINGS, then it's my depression sucker punching me when I least expect it.
PS: My mother knows about the procedures, which by extension means my sister knows. And I haven't gotten so much as a text, email, or call from her to see how I am doing. I guess it's my punishment for not going to my niece's graduation party (graduation from ELEMENTARY school, btw) a few weeks back. Folks fail to realize how debilitating pain and depression can be, and fail to remember that if I do go to family functions it's normally done solo. But hey, let's vilify and punish me because I married a man who refuses to play my family's passive aggressive games. It just perpetuates the loss of my dad, and the feelings I have that God and family have forsaken me.
*SIGH.*
Off to shower I go, and hoping for the very best for today, and hoping my friend's birthday barbeque is a lovely, enjoyable affair for everyone.
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