Ya Never Know What to Expect

This is what I love about the city, within which I work. Unpredictability. IN YOUR FACE kinda unpredictability.

I no sooner finished chatting with Jabippy-Lou, when I returned to the elevator queue and waited for the next lift up, when I was hit with a rather gamey, sour stench... and lo-and-behold! Next to the garbage can was chunkage. DELICIOUS!!! CLASSY!!

I fine visual for me to have as I trotted off to my Reiki healing circle. Seing chunky, sour, sick, as I'm off to a class to rid my body and soul and psyche of its own variety of SICK.

It's all good though. I'm sure the pidgeons will be eating quite well as a result of this. All the better for them to squirt their Rorschach-like shit all over my car. All the better for the owner of the local car wash.
It's all good.

It's been over a month since I last attended a Reiki healing circle, as I was on vacation when the last one was held. One of the Reiki masters was taken aback by whatever improvement there has been with me, my body, and my energy. She quickly asked me what I had been doing differently. And I basically said nothing crazy, I just changed my soap and I've been on L*xapro for about five weeks. She said she noticed a big change with me, as if I dropped a lot of weight, my belly has shrunk, somewhat, and overall I'm lacking in that "train-wreck-je-ne-sais-quois"... that untouchable, yet palpable sense that I was on the verge of falling apart.

There was a decided theme in our circle. We all were there with neck, shoulder, and upper back complaints. I usually an reluctant to say what I am attending any healing circle for, as I prefer that the practitioner use intuition (this appeals to the skeptic in me, too, if I see that they focus their energies and touch on the area without me saying so). I feel a little better physically. Not much. But emotionally... noticably better.

Apparently the left side of the body is the feminine, and the chakra of the throat and neck pertain to our ability or inability to communicate. Seems we all had problems with our mothers last night. Fancy that!

Last night's experience reminded me that I promised myself a one-on-one session with the Master, and also a swedish massage elsewhere.

But I was aware last night, as the Reiki Master was hugging me, that her hug was the first hug in a long time, that just manifested itself. I didn't initiate the hug. I didn't demand or ask for the hug. She just gave it. And even though I know I am loved by my husband (who doesn't tell me nearly enough), it was well worth the class fee, to have a virtual stranger extend love to me. Perhaps it might be enough for me to love myself enough to forgive myself for past misdeeds...