Gin hasn't touched my lips since roughly 1998 or 1999, when I made the distinct connection that it makes me feel NOTABLY melancholy.
And it's only today that, at age 45 that I start thinking about melancholy ITSELF. And yes. I am melancholy to one degree or another, every single day.
The more I read, the more I am convinced that my health issues are impacting my melancholy-ness. The issue at hand that I think that's driving it more and more as of late is the hypercortisolemia. And yet, I haven't taken the first dose of Wellbutrin because at least on an intellectual level, I see it as nothing more than a futile bandaid being adhered to treat a sucking chest wound (otherwise, ineffective).
Tomorrow: phone session with therapist, as scheduled.
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