Struggling with depression and pain (STILL, I know), and thought I'd give myself today to sleep in a bit (45 extra minutes) and blow off the bike.
I got up at 7:30, and when I realized Maharajah was working from home today, I realized that I could manage my 30 minutes on the bike before getting myself ready for work.
I cannot tell, does this mean it is now an ingrained behavior and habit?
I convinced myself I need it at least for helping with my circulation. And I knocked it out, no problem.
But I'm still fucking depressed and despairing, and an upcoming vacation isn't enough to turn that around (newsflash: it NEVER is enough to turn things around). The sun and change of scenery will be nice, but right now it's too abstract for me to process or even anticipate.
No call or email from surgeon at NYU Langone yet. And I checked my email (the one I use for such purposes), and it's devoid of any replies regarding the resumes I sent out earlier this week.
During my session with my therapist yesterday, he and I both agreed that all things considered, I am "managing well" in spite of the setback of not getting the job, and no real resolution to the pain issues.
27 More days until I have the day of EPIC APPOINTMENTS (rheumatology consult, my nephrology check up, and the endocrinology consult). Was hoping to round things out with a consult with the surgeon.
Hurry up and wait.
I got up at 7:30, and when I realized Maharajah was working from home today, I realized that I could manage my 30 minutes on the bike before getting myself ready for work.
I cannot tell, does this mean it is now an ingrained behavior and habit?
I convinced myself I need it at least for helping with my circulation. And I knocked it out, no problem.
But I'm still fucking depressed and despairing, and an upcoming vacation isn't enough to turn that around (newsflash: it NEVER is enough to turn things around). The sun and change of scenery will be nice, but right now it's too abstract for me to process or even anticipate.
No call or email from surgeon at NYU Langone yet. And I checked my email (the one I use for such purposes), and it's devoid of any replies regarding the resumes I sent out earlier this week.
During my session with my therapist yesterday, he and I both agreed that all things considered, I am "managing well" in spite of the setback of not getting the job, and no real resolution to the pain issues.
27 More days until I have the day of EPIC APPOINTMENTS (rheumatology consult, my nephrology check up, and the endocrinology consult). Was hoping to round things out with a consult with the surgeon.
Hurry up and wait.
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